“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” (Matthew 5:4)
Navigating loss is one of the toughest things we have to do as humans. Losing someone special to you is hard enough by itself. It is even more difficult when you realize that things will never be the same. Anytime you lose something, you press the “Reset” button.
When you lose a spouse to death or divorce, it presses the “Reset” button. The same thing happens when you receive an unwanted health diagnosis, lose a job, or you are forced to make a significant life change. As we walk through seasons like this, it is important that we take the time to mourn the loss and not skip over it. We need to feel our loss, not flee from it. God does not want us to live in denial. He doesn’t want us to act like nothing happened, because doing that won’t make it go away.
Grieving and mourning take time; they are not overnight processes. Your Heavenly Father doesn’t usually heal you overnight. It is imperative that we go through each stage of grief in order to fully heal and recover from the loss we have experienced. Let’s take a quick look at each of these stages:
- Shock and denial: This is the stage where you can’t believe this has actually happened to you. It is completely normal to experience denial and confusion immediately after a loss.
- Pain and guilt: This is when you begin to say things like, “I should have done this instead,” or “If I had done that, this wouldn’t have happened.”
- Anger and bargaining: This is the stage where you are angry at someone. If you can’t find someone, you often point your anger toward God. You might think, “If God loved me, He wouldn’t have allowed this to happen.”
- Depression and reflection: This is when deep sadness sets in, as you begin to process what you have lost.
- Acceptance and hope: In this final stage of grief, the upward turn occurs. You work all the way through your loss, come to terms with what has happened, and move forward with hopeful feelings.
It is very important that you walk through each of these stages when you are experiencing loss and grief. As you move through this process, the best thing you can do is seek the Lord. He promises to be close to the brokenhearted. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.(Psalm 34:18) Draw near to Him today as you grieve and mourn, and watch your Heavenly Father do an incredible, healing work in your life.